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At Tech2 we normally don’t review movies but this is a movie based on a genre defining franchise so what the hell right? Maybe I’m getting too old for conventional, cheesy and clichéd Hollywood blockbusters because for some reason I really found it tough to stay awake in Disney’s adaptation of the Prince of Persia: Sands of Time (which thankfully was not in 3D). Extremely loosely based on Ubisoft’s resurrection of the Prince of Persia series, the Sands of Time sees Prince Dastan - played by Jake Gyllenhaal - on a noble quest to prevent armageddon at the hands of the dastardly Nizam (Ben Kingsley). In this noble endeavor he’s aided by Princess Tamina played annoyingly by Gemma Arterton. Tagging along for the ride are a bunch of one dimensional, clichéd characters found in most Disney family movies, most of which are too generic to even mention. One character however stands out from the pact and that’s Sheik Amar, played by Alfred Molina who brings some much needed humor to this movie. To be honest Gylllenhaal nearly pulled off the charming, brash and suave prince we’ve come to know from the Sands of Time (the game). He also brought in this devil may care attitude to the mix that was appreciated. Princess Tamina on the other hand came across as an extremely whiny little damsel in distress who I personally hoped met a grisly end. But alas that didn’t happen, this being a stupid PG rated movie and all. In fact a huge part of me died with the whole PG rating as most action sequences were too tame for my tastes. No I wasn’t expecting a blood fest like 300 but you can still pull off a battle scene without catering to just five year olds you know. Also for some reason I think the director got his games mixed up. You’re making Prince of Persia man, not Assassin’s Creed (AC). What was up with the excessive amount of free running, some of which was pretty much lifted straight from AC? I was expecting more wall running and definitely more usage of the Sands of Time themselves. I’m talking slowing time down, freezing enemies or any other cool visual tricks the movie could have implemented. Instead I got a few measly time rewinds and Jake Gylanhall running around semi topless doing CG somersaults – and free running for two hours (now I know why women liked this movie). Oh and the CG in this movie was not bad per say but it really paled in comparison to some of the stuff we’ve seen in recent times. Contrary to what this review may make you believe I am not the Citizen Kane loving kind and I really don’t expect movies like Prince of Persia to rock my world. What pisses me of is the fact that everything in this movie is so painfully clichéd it made me sick to my stomach. I went in there expecting a mindless yet entertaining game to movie adaptation. What I got was mindless yes, but a barely entertaining Disney flick that probably gave me diabetes with its saccharine sweet treatment to the whole franchise. |
Tags: Prince of Persia , Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time , Ubisoft , Disney
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